(Christian friends...don't freak out yet about the title of this--read what I have to say first; you're going to agree with me most likely.)
So...I know I need to write about my Las Vegas trip in here...so I'll mention it vaguely in this post.
However,
what I really want to talk about is something that God has put on my
heart in the last few days. You know how unbelievers always say that God
is just a crutch for the emotional, ignorant, and naive people out
there that just need to feel that something loves them? When I was
younger, I had a hard time finding a way to argue against this
accusation. I mean, it is nice to know that someone (namely, God) loves
me, no matter what I do.
I know that a lot of people will only go
to God after tragedy, and often they leave Him in the dust the moment
they feel they can carry on from there. To the unbeliever, the claim
that Jesus is merely a crutch is just waiting to come up--especially
since so many people use Him in that way.
I'm hear to say, however, that Jesus is a
crutch. Why else would He die on the cross for us? If we didn't need
Him, like a person with a broken leg needs a crutch, why would we go to
Him? When sin entered through Adam, thus coming into our lives, our
whole body suddenly became a mess. For starters, we died. There was pain
in child-birth, in bending over too much, in getting a splinter.
Animals began to eat each other. The perfect relationship we could've
had with God was torn apart, as was relationships with each other. The
first murder was between two brothers.
And don't even get me
started with the Israelites. Anyone whose read Judges, or really, any
Old Testament book, knows that the Israelites were an absolute mess
without Abba. They raped and killed each other all the time.
And
then Jesus came. He came to die on the cross to wipe away our sins. This
is a fancy way of saying that He was prescribed from God, our "doctor",
to go down and be the humans' crutch, because we obviously didn't/don't
know what the heck to do without God. Jesus was and is our medicine,
and without this medicine..well, we die, for starters. Contrary to
belief, we cannot do things without Christ, just as a man with a bad leg
cannot do anything without a crutch.
So then, am I saying that the atheists are right?
No, I am not. The atheist says Jesus is a crutch because he/she
believes that God is not necessary in their lives, because they are
"strong enough". They don't understand the actual effects of each individual sin they commit. They don't see how necessary this free crutch is in their lives. They don't see that they are not strong enough.
As
Christians, we are not accepting defeat to the world when we have God
in our lives. 1 John 5:5, my above-all favorite verse, says that the
only one's who overcome the world are those that believe that Jesus is
the Son of God. It doesn't say anything to the effect of, "those that
overcome the world are just stronger that the rest." No, we all sin and
fall short of the glory of God. We are all weak in our own ways; sin has
that affect on us, believe it or not.
Let me just point out that
every sin is the same level of importance to God. By hating your
enemy, you sin. By snapping at someone out of anger, you sin. By not
obeying authority, you sin. By judging someone, you sin. I could go on,
but I think this is enough.
And yet, yet, the unbeliever has the audacity to tell me, to tell any Christian, that they are wrong and that they actually don't need God.
I
like knowing that although I've sinned today, it won't register in
God's book since I am clean. I think all the Christians like knowing
this, and those who have strayed but come back to the faith love knowing
that we are saved my mercy alone even more.
I am proud to say that Jesus is my (fully-needed) crutch, because without Him I'd be toast.
Alrighty, on to the Las Vegas trip! I'll make it short: IT.WAS.A.BLAST. I meant a lot of really neat people and got to know some people from my new youth group. :) I miss the kids from Vegas like crazy, and hope to see some-if not all of 'em- in Heaven with me one day. Sometimes I catch myself daydreaming about happening to run into some of them, or me going back to the church down there and seeing them. Maybe someday I can go back; my fingers are crossed. :)
This trip taught me three things: One, I pretty much have decided, thanks to this trip, that my "career" will involve children. I don't want to work with elementary students I don't think, because although I love that age, I love the younger kids even more. Further, with younger kids I wouldn't have to plan out lessons to the same extent, and I imagine my classroom would be more "free". Those that know me well enough know I don't like planning. So I'm thinking something like Day-care, Pre-school, or maybe Kindergarten.
Two: I learned, or, revisited, the fact that I am not in control of someone's salvation, but God is. I can pour my heart and life into a kid, hoping they'll eventually figure out that God is the only way, but in the end I cannot force it upon them. I formed a pretty strong bond with one of the kids there, for example, and her name is Jorydn. She's about 8 years old, and my gosh, she was/is adorable. During the VBS week, she came to know God...or at least, she said she did. But I don't think her Mom's a Christian, and her parents are divorced, leading me to believe the same of her Dad and extended family (just a theory. Hopefully I'm wrong). So how can a little 8 year-old go back home, without a Bible in hand (we didn't give them away!! D:), and continue her walk with Christ with absolutely no support?
Before I left on my vacation, I was constantly daydreaming that I'd meet a little girl who would be in this type of situation. I imagined that I'd form a strong bond with her, and at the end of the week, I would give her my cross necklace that I always wear around my neck, to remind her of Christ's undying love for her. When I first met Jordyn, I wondered if she was the one my daydream had been thinking of. I remember at least one of the night's there praying to God, asking Him if He actually wanted me to give away my necklace to her, if she was the one, if He even wanted me to part from it.
And then, on the last day, I found myself answering a question of her's: As a Christian, what was her job now (smart kid, no?)? I answered by saying stuff like get to know God by reading your Bible ("Do you have one?" "No." "Have your Mom buy you one, okay?"), praying and going to church, and telling people at school all about God's love, because especially in Las Vegas, they wouldn't know about it. Then I found myself taking the necklace off of my neck and giving it to her, telling her that when people made fun of my God at school, I would always clutch it to me, and if I was feeling brave enough, tell them about God (the second part was kind-of-ish half-way true...but hey, not completely a lie!). I put it around her neck, and as we left, she immediately went up to her Mom and showed her.
I'm hoping that necklace is helping her remember. I really hope so.
But again, as I struggled with this concept of "I should've done more for her", my parents had to keep reminding me that saving her is NOT my job; it is the Holy Spirit's.
I hope I'll see her in Heaven someday.
And number three..I learned parenting techniques and patience. xD VBS at this church was not your normal VBS. No, these kids were watching a performance for about an hour and a half, a third of which was a sermon. Keep in mind, these kids ranged in ages from 3-12. For half the week, I was holding a squirmy, rambunctious little three-year-old named Sawyer, who had the hardest time sitting still. The first day, I left irritated with the little guy, hoping I wouldn't have to hold him again because he was just too much trouble. But then the second day I was with him again, and this time...well, I realized it's hard to stay mad at the little tyke. He's just too cute. I found ways to make him quiet for up to five minutes (!), and in the end I was sad to leave him behind. Every time I see a photo of him now from the trip I can't help but smile.
So yeah...that's my mission's trip in a nutshell (although, I realize now it was kinda long...oh well!).
If you made it through, congrats!
School starts again this upcoming Tuesday, so you probably won't hear from me much. FB friends, I'm about to post a video of my summer, so keep your eyes open!
~Kathy
